Monday, June 3, 2013

A Matured Relationship

Don't think I'm unaware for I'm fully conscious of the speculations and stalking activities that have been going around for some time. Well to set the record straight, and let you all hear it from the horse's mouth itself, I'm still single. Perhaps a little taken by heart, but I'm not getting deep into that. And those who already formed chains and any sort of linkages of me to another man, kindly erase it please.

So moving on, since the confession just made the rumor mill turn sour, lets add a little spice . Today I wanna talk about relationship. A topic which I left long ago in this blog while I was still complimented and seeked for relationship advices occasionally by members of the society. This canvas I shall fill with my version of a matured relationship.

Well let me tell you this, your relationship if you think can't be named as matured, kindly dispose it. Or if you are in it for some hidden agendas which I presume to be very ugly like to cure loneliness, gold digging etc, I suggest therapy! You people need help. A relationship i believe should be shared by 2 matured individuals who loves each other in a sane manner, be able to lead their lives without compromising their individuality and pursuits, and last but not least acts as a support system emotionally. Basically comes down to adequate love, freedom and support.

Before you even open your mouth to object, mind you this is my opinion.

Quotes might support the notion of love having to be crazy , I don't. Crazy leads to more crazy, period. A relationship that lasts always has a good balance in terms of emotions. And that is the main reason why they could survive the distance and various circumstances life throws. Crazy only pulls her hair and she pulling his hair at the end of the day. But this too will survive, convincing own-self with the crazy love quotes , trying to hide the soured feelings. There goes another man or woman gripping so hard fearing the sea of loneliness that could drown him/her. But hey, have faith will travel.

Next speaking of freedom. Yes if you love someone you should be able to be yourself with that person. I would kiss the person who said that, in this case apparently its me ;-) I always advise my friends to try to survive a relationship or friendship for more than 6 months to validate your feelings. It's because humans can't be fake more than that period of time. They will voluntarily switch to their normal self, that's human capacity and apparently a bingo to everyone if you use it to your advantage. Watch him and watch yourself , if you can go 6 months yet get better, you've scored. However just in case things only turn haywire thereafter, thank god and move on. Come on you are probably gonna spend decades with this person, you don't want to come home feeling the need to become a girl with swag or a girl next door just to keep it going!! Freedom also means the approval of you pursuing your dreams and make your own decisions when the need arises. Couples doesn't mean farewell to individual choices. Two separate people are involved therefore one still has full rights over his or her life, unless a bigger institution like family is concerned. The last one is freedom in social media. Stalking when it comes to a matured relationship which is obviously founded by trust, is a pure no! Bookmarking his or her Facebook and twitter page to see his or her activities, that's very ugly. Sounds like my pupils love story to me. Grow up! Find a better hobby.

Support system. A life partner being a good support system especially emotionally is very crucial and do call yourself lucky if you have landed one in your life. I know some people in a relationship who just don't have heart to heart conversations at all. They call themselves emotionally-closed people but I think they are only emotionally detached in the relationship. Guys do share emotions, girls i need not say. The only difference is guy selectively tells, while we girls blurt to even a bunch of gossip mongers! So if he's not telling you, probably he's telling someone else. Hey I didn't say he is cheating, merely stating he isn't comfortable revealing some things to you, which I assume is not a good thing. I don't know about you all, but I only want a relationship in which a good support system can be formed between me and my partner. That's very important to me.

I have covered the vital elements that i believe should constitute a matured relationship. Hope my two cents helped! Remember, there's nothing called the perfect love at the end of the day , it all comes to whether we can live happily with it or better off without it.

Renuka G