Saturday, November 13, 2010

N3xT M33t...

are you proud of it??
At times it really feels sad to reflect back past relationships. It gives a weird feeling, like you put yourself out there so badly and loved some one soo much then it all reaches THE END. Its like ‘who predicted’.  It sucks even more to know that you have been replaced in a nick of time. Later you start thinking back all the odds assuming that everything including the relationship itself was fake, it hurts like hell!
At certain point in your life you will just fall soo badly like you don’t feel like putting yourself out there anymore. it hurts so much that you don’t want to even look at their faces anymore! but at the same time you just find yourself choked in emotions not being able to forget the person whom you once thought your world. It seriously sucks. Each time when his thoughts cross my mind, I feel like bursting into tears. I couldn’t help it because this is the sole time I really gave all my love to someone, and felt it reciprocated fully but little did I know all could just come crashing on me at the end. I never felt such agony  in a lifetime.  I hate myself for not being able to forget someone who had forgotten me. I really want to be over all this because I don’t think I deserve whatever I'm going through, but yea I'm helpless. 

Things in life are unpredictable, its like one day you are on the top of the world thinking what could go wrong and the next moment you find yourself answering EVERYTHING! He said I suffocated him but he killed me. I find the word LOVE to be soo familiar yet I just can’t recall. He broke me down but not the whole of me, he just destroyed my beliefs on true love and honesty. I don’t wanna hear from you and I pray we will never ever cross each others’ path .

During my first break up, I didn’t have hatred towards love nor I questioned the ability of true relationships, now I do! I don’t believe in true love. Its just an non existing notion people created to continue in the world full of illusions! 

I believe I believe one day I wont even remember your name, I will forget your face, I will walk pass you knowing nothing. I will get over this shit, trust me I will. But for now, I will take the pain. I will accept all stabs. Let me say thank you now because we are going to anonymous to each other soon.
I don’t wanna teach anyone lessons nor I wish to seek sympathy, I am just making it clear that I take time recover and when I really do, I-NEVER-KNEW-YOU! 



gs said...

They say the first cut is the deepest, taht does not mean we sit and lick our wounds for the rest of our lives.Nurse the wounds an be on your feet again. People come people go what leaves u is for your own good, thats truth time wld reveal.Nothing can be more truthfull and genuine then the love for yourself.Man proposes god disposes, god knows best !Walk tall with a guilty free mind,thats important let those who pierced our hearts go to hell. Its like this , for them love is a ball to kick around but fools like us treated love like glass and it went to pieces !The fault was ours, to leave our doors open ! Shedding tears for people who betrayed u is stupidity and to recollect those memories is absurd !To be on Not to be ?!Its better not to be !A free bird wld never value or appreciate its freedom until its caged !In real life True love does not exsist true lust does !In the chase for both lust always victors over love.Bear that in mind and walk tall.stop making your brown eyes blue,.........lets rapunzel tonite !!