Sunday, June 27, 2010

DOn'T KNow

i don't even know. well, that is the huge deal for me now..its like i don't even know what i am doing, what i wanna do , what i have  to do! i know i would somehow wind up in this situation, but now i am already there and i don't know what to do ...last night i was holding my phone for probably an hour thinking whether to call or not, today my friends asked me if i wanna go out, and here i am sitting and thinking for about 30 minutes! i so don't know..why am i soo fuzzy, uncertain, fickle, i don't know..

something bothering me? well, a lot of things bothering me..i just wish i were like the dandelion bonds, no history, just floating off into the world each on its own piece of fluff..doesn't it sound nice? hmm perhaps..problems are fused in our DNAs , its like DONE, we can't do anything about it..whether you transform a dandelion seed or a dandy lil lion..i know that doesn't make sense, it rhymes and thats great..whatever!

its seriously wrong and so fake if i were to  say that i am better off without problems..we need problems to mould us, make us stronger yada yada..but too many at once is getting jimmy choo's without discounts! OucHhh that is certainly a pinch..hmm like the saying goes or maybe the song goes, one step at a time, why can't it be like one problem at once or anything like that. why must everything come in a package or a buy 1 free 1 policy! that sucks~

to make everything worst, lets hear about myself.. i am not a good problem solver nor decision maker..i think this punch is hard enough to push me down..screwed! one word tells it all! 

i am just hoping things to recover by itself.. i don't feel like stirring anything now..time is a best healer, so lets give it some i mentioned in my previous post, at times things have to get worst before it gets better...

RaeN G