Self-help? Seriously ?

Today I met myself between the alleys of self enrichment racks in the book store. It was a sudden sense of an indescribable feeling. I used to curiously read through the pages looking for a little attachment to the story told. Today it was mere awkwardness. It was as if I was standing amongst a group of aliens with too much annoyance . 

Hardwiring happiness?

This book will make you mindful?

A cup of comfort?

101 days to success? 

I rolled my eyes reading each and every title. Like, seriously ? Nothing made sense , at least not this time. I wonder why people buy these books? Why they were once so significant? 

Now I had only one thought in my mind. To grab all of them , rip off the pages of nonsense, throw the pieces in the air and walk off in that shower with a background score! I did not say my life is better or that it has gotten any worse. I lost attachment to these books. They don't feel relevant to me anymore. 

None has never changed me. My life took turns over experiences not some prescribed ideas of someone with a completely different life. Perhaps I have read some interesting quotes that were motivating but change is definetely from within and the moving factor would without a doubt be things that happened to me.

Standing there today just reminded me of one thing, how smartly words are aligned to lure people into the idea of success and a better self . As catchy as most titles may sound, the books are actually empty. You are reading empty pages with raging emotions and an intense desire for a new day and a new destiny . They are indeed empty .

You are not looking for help or enrichment . The only gleam of hope you are reaching for at this section is only a little sense of belonging and attachment. The curiosity of knowing somebody has been through the same and came pass it. The curiosity of finding out who got it worse. And finally the curiosity of a possible , proven-to-work solution, which is apparently non existent in most cases. Too bad.

Change starts with you. A trip to the book store will just be a rip in your pocket and a few useless flips of the pages .

Does this sound like 'A cup of comfort'?

Renuka G

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I

The ultimate goal at the moment is to be better than yesterday. We all run after success, or at least  most of us do. There are some who run obediently in their own lane at their own pace. Another bunch pushes those next to them and turn their head to watch who's coming after .It's just how the universe works. Some compete with their own self while the rest battles the  whole world.

My measure of success is parallel to progress. This has always allowed me to be more open to views of others, appreciate their individual abilities and cheer upon their success. Having a perspective as such has also opened doors for a more meaningful progress.


So what's next?

Something for sure!

Renuka G

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Are you game?

The feeling. That damned feeling is back.

People often perceive success as the result of consistent acceptance and fixture of failures. It's like using the negatives to open path to the positives adhering much to the core-most rule of life , ups and downs. As much as you wish you could run, it's the simple motion of a ball bouncing back from a surface. You move back and forth between sweetness and the bitter-side of events, you hit and bounce back.

Although there's a slim chance that you possess a complete anatomy and mechanics similar to ball, more often that is not the case. Sometimes a hit is all you need to fall face-down . At times a hit is more than enough to cripple you so long that it twists the plot altogether.

This is not some friendly prescription of motivational dose nor a faint-sprinkle of fairy dust to the world.

Welcome to rock bottom!

Exactly where life serves you a platter of cold, raw meat at a dinner table with depression and helplessness as sidelines. You wish you could look for inspiration and search restlessly the self-esteem that you know had hidden itself somewhere but to no avail. Again, welcome to rock bottom!

Here, you will chase after a shooting star while simultaneously being frisked by the most daunted of all fears in the real world, the fear of failure. You will run like a mad dog after a bone only to discover the price of the wish is not the chase.

Time will neither be your enemy nor your friend. Time is a distant variable which mocks you and your efforts while still being in motion. You wait, you wait for the clues that it may drop. In your mind you build thoughts that time will soon favour you, it will soon divert its path towards you. You wish and you keep wishing as it continuously proves you wrong.

The final bashing you have at rock bottom, the withdrawal of hope. We are born equipped with a belief system. A system that could collapse like any other. Your good thoughts will soon turn grey and eventually die. And a negative belief system is a dead-system afterall. Wishes will be replaced by anger which will accumulate into merciless acts of self-destruction. Nothing matters. Anything  becomes everything and everything becomes anything. Now, you are officially game.

Only once in a while, an occasional reflection on the mirror will bombard you with questions of your long-gone identity. It would be fun. Everyone loves a little mystery. The moments of struggle to discover the exact turning point which destroyed you to unrecognizable and non-fixable state would challenge your own curiosity.

This is where you return to square one.

The question though is, will it lead you back to a moment of sheer-bitterness or destructive-sweetness?

Renuka G

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