Freedom is a choice

It was just a few days before my 24th birthday that I decided to opt out from Facebook and now it has been a month away from the ever so-coveted social networking site. Well given the past, this isn't at all a new scenario since I have deactivated my Facebook for countless times in the past few years, for numerous reasons which somehow in some ways navigated me back where I wanted to elude. I was undecided. Safe to say, most people are indeed undecided. While there are kids trying to snoop into it disregarding their parents' opinions, there are Gen-Ys getting sick and bored of the brag-worthy filtered-life filling the void between conversations and work.

The intention to leave is there however, it is also followed by the dread of FOMO ( Feeling Of Missing Out). As much as some of us want the world to talk about the most general of things, people actually, are just impossibly generous with their knowledge of people which is unfortunate. Sitting at lunch discussing over a friend's new life event which you apparently missed, isn't cool. Or to be precise, will not be accepted as cool. While your degree of coolness decreases and ego gets bruised, you will then be reminded of what an alien you are among that group of friends. Not to burst your bubble but waving goodbye to your sense of belonging is hard because that without a doubt is a basic human need, blame Maslow. The next thing you know you are scrolling hungrily to feed yourself everything you've missed or in another simple, blunt note is called 'stalking'.

If you are all set  to survive the awkwardness, there comes another complication. Something is extremely wrong with society these days but it's hard to blame it on them. I guess you'd admit if I were to claim Facebook to be the most convenient platform for file sharing if you are not in an organization which wants things to be done the right way instead of the easy way, or perhaps simply has restricted you access to the site during office hours. Isn't it just so easy to drag a couple of files while you still keep up with the ever-updating feeds? Yes, Google drive was invented for a reason so does iCloud, Evernote etc but who cares right? Considering the "innovation", people assume Facebook to be the next big thing they should never abandon.

Let's just say you are prepared to stand by the pain of organizing a storage drive, you just feel the emptiness of life in between tv commercials, awkward moments while waiting for your food and a weird sense of guilt over the reason behind the smartphone in your grip. Then you bounce back ! I had those reasons messing my stand and many more I can't elaborate yet I've survived. Perhaps it would sound really wrong to say I kind of don't miss it anymore. Everything mentioned above are temptations which are indeed possible to overcome. I fought those excuses to alternatives which eventually formed new habits. I'm happy up to this point.

Facebook isn't bad as long as it isn't an addiction. The problem though is, are you sure you're not a slave yet? On a different note, do you even care? Stick to what matters to you. I just done, at least amidst this ever-increasing pile of work .

Renuka G

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Into the Wild

People read for various reasons. I read to be inspired. Perhaps that's why I don't simply walk into the bookstore and pick a read. Books that I've read and had a hard time to let go are the ones which crossed me by accident. Though cheesy and love story-ish it might sound, it is indeed undeniable that I'm fussy when it comes to books. Most of my collections are either a movie or true story. I believe in learning and these stories are truly inspiring to the extent of addiction and of course self-realization.

My recent read is Into the wild by Jon Krakauer. I hadn't read any books after Gone Girl till I came across this one. It's the story of a young boy named Johnson McCandless who abandoned his good life and dearest possessions to travel 'into the wild'. He died tragically but that's not the case. The life he lived was without a doubt remarkable with top notch values for his age.

There's something about his perspective of life which sets him apart for any random person 'living'. He was blessed with everything a normal teenager would desire yet, why he left? What was his quest? And at the end of the story will you see him like just another reckless idiot who abandoned his good life or as something else? These questions would make you turn the pages . It's for the thinkers who evaluate moral codes in a non judgmental manner. It's for people who understand 'things' and the value of each of those in life at whole.

Going footloose is of course intriguing and exciting, given the recent trend, it is also rather glamorous. The association of travel with escape is a cliche-connection people use to sculpt their stories of independent-self with much pride. Johnson was rather humble. He knew the world has flawed codes and he was sick of the society which he phrased as a 'crazy-breed'.  He was complaining, profusely complaining. Unlike the crowd, he set out to live the life which he believed in. His journey was not a glamorous road. His passion for new horizons were not mere words. His adventures were novel. Most importantly, his experiences were something one can never imagine to risk. He wanted to be lost to feel alive. Death was predictable yet nothing mattered more than his bond with the roads he took.

It's not like a story you want to live. Just one capable of making you reason choices in life and the beauty of the real universe without the 'things' people feel obsessed over which in return possess them in a way or another. This book is of class! A walk away from civilization so close to fiction with every page of adept descriptions teaching something this world has  now been missing.

Johnson McCandless lived, his story tells the rest.

Renuka G

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The Vision

While we were making headlines in some local newspapers this morning, an incident at school hit me real hard inside. Honestly speaking, I admit I'm not much of a teacher from within. I do my job. I take responsibilities seriously and that's that. Sometimes, just sometimes I get really overwhelmed with certain things which afflicts me. I dislike kids, true. However, sympathy is an emotion I shower my pupils with because I know they deserve it.

I was having basically sharing with a colleague about the frustrations and disappointments I land myself in every day because of the pupils' lack of effort and zero ambition. It was not a surprise that we were in the same boat. That was when she told me something which saddened me beyond belief. This is not my passion. This is not even close to what I wanted to be. But this feeling is real. I was upset when she revealed what these kids will eventually become someday. The girls will either be working after high school or married. The boys go astray. Those who actually make it to the university are so few, what more those who really succeeds and leave a mark?

For some reasons, I feel some of us are very lucky to be born in a place where education is attainable and accessible. Plus we are blessed to be born in a family which values the ability to read and write than petty skills and norms. These kids, not all but most of them are unfortunate. One of the reason I could coin based on their attitude would be lack of inspiration. They have nobody's success to drool at. The only influence they have is the TV channels which repeatedly air programmes full of sobbing, revenge and everything negative enough to spoil a kid's thoughts into an adult's mind-frame. They do not enjoy internet access like we do. I'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad one yet, for a kid to not know who is Mahatma Gandhi and their own state is a serious issue I guess.

There are countless number of problems and issues within this small community and the children are simply the scapegoat of a reality which have been going on for years or perhaps decades.
It's a sad case scenario indeed.
Who to blame?
Who to change?
How to transform?
I guess every single teacher with or without passion would at least once thought about this. But in a place as such, heat of the moment would be a joy to watch yet it gets cold real fast and the next thing you know the past repeats itself somehow or someway. It's similar  to a pendulum which sways with a push so fast and gets slow , eventually stopping at point . The next push and no matter how many more that comes won't last forever, either.

Sympathy, anger and frustration are mundane routines which leave me with guilt. Perhaps my expectations are high. Maybe I'm trying too hard that I fail the same way. I feel lost figuring the small steps which leads to a big change. The hope is there still, though. When there's a will, there's a way, right?

Renuka G

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Plans and Pursuits

Who ever expected that I would get back my hometown?

But I am not changing any part of my plan. I wanted to start the hard way and progress through it , that is exactly what I will be doing. It's a long scary 50 minutes drive from home, small school with people of golden hearts, English and Arts, Year 1 and year 6 in my schedule, and many more challenges that I choose not to overly fuss about. Perhaps the years I have spent dreaming of my future turned me into this ambitious girl that I am now. Or it could merely be the whole ' new broom sweeps well' scenario. Let time reveal.

You can place any bets on me but I have already embarked my journey. As I have always desired, I finally signed up for gym and started with light weights. My dad apparently had a shock because it was super tiring  to come home at 5 and head to gym by 5.30 everyday but, this is what I want. I dread ending up like those people who neglect working out using their work as an excuse. Your body is your best friend and the only way to stay healthy is to keep fit. Plus I feel more positive and happy after this routine. Try it! Exercising does make a huge difference in your personality and EQ.

Next, tuition. Cliche ! I already got some offers for home tuition and I will not say no. So what if I am still at the warming up stage of my job ? I can teach. 2 hours a day can't hurt, at least I choose to believe so. Plus they say, you will never know how far you can go if you don't push yourself enough. I already have home-comfort (thank god!) , the rest should be challenging or I will drown and disappear. For once I am happy teaching.  It's like my passion for English yearning to make a  difference in the lives of these kids and more kids. It's stressful to get them to understand without using a word of their mother tongue, but once you succeed the feeling is out of the world. I can go another day for that passion and the thought of me changing at least a little part of their world.

So you think I'm forgoing my baking pursuits? Hell NO! I have enquired some certificate courses for baking and pastry during the weekends. Ambitious uh? Before I pursue my masters, I want to do something simply for sheer passion and the fun of it. Fingers crossed.

This is not me boasting about my grand plans, do not misunderstand. This is about me reminding myself how badly I want to progress. I want to be better. If I ever stop that means I am the best version of me already. You know, 'best' is a myth. The world is full of knowledge, I wish to conquer as much as I can.

Wish me luck!

Renuka G

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Street-Peeper

One thing that I enjoy occasionally is watching people. I believe a way to learn apart from books is through people, random strangers we come across. You may develop leadership skills by reading Stephen Covey's or make your life better with a copy of Spencer Johnson's, however, what you will truly value is the visual experience of watching a totally random man doing an act which you thought impossible or you felt ignorant about.  The theory behind is pretty simple. If one man can do it, so does another.

I was at the hospital the other day to get done my medical report and I saw so many things, so many people. It was such an interesting day after weeks  of staying home. Ok I did go out, but it was not as significant as this experience. Be it the man who was carrying a sweet wrapper till he found a rubbish bin or the lady at the registration counter who was greeting everyone with a smile, they all have something to teach. Who are these people? Only known as humans to me they managed to show the good deeds we can do every day. Do I need to know them? Or add them on social networks to understand their lives? I don't think so.

Good things done do not need a justification. We just need to question ourselves if we are capable of following those acts. The answer is yes. Prickly though, we are curious of the wrong things. We try to severe what we see with reasons. Convincing ourselves, the lady was smiling because that's her job and the man was responsible because  he was being watched. At the end, we learn nothing. So whose loss is that?

To be better, watch strangers. Pick up good manners and simple act of kindness. Stop passing biased judgements only to prove yourself right. The world is full of lessons for those who cherish every encounter and experience. They will never stop learning and they know there's always more knowledge to chase after.

Stop being a lazy dreamer, open your eyes to the people around you instead.

Renuka G

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Dancing with weights

Yesterday of all the days got me swinging to the peak of happiness. It was those times you feel so much joy and the reason seems to be plenty to name. Perhaps because I have always been away in the past that this long long stay home has gotten pretty overwhelming.

I love enjoying the moments in my life. Be it the rough ones or the sweetest happenings, I always take some time to muse over things and embrace whatever that's happening. It was indeed the happiest thing to be home and taste homemade ponggal after 5 years, at the same time realising that I might not have this luxury in the coming years. Ok it may have sounded like a military man returning to his camp but a teacher too possibly has the same reality. Some of the teachers serving in the interiors of Sabah and Sarawak have their family back in the peninsular. It's not easy to travel back and forth setting aside the expenses for one journey home. Yet they are making it happen! Every single day in the jungles where even a phone call is a matter of luck and blessings.

But I'm happy even if that shall be my destiny. And by god's will I will be happy. I leave that to time. Who knows, I might get posted somewhere near, right?  Back to my story. I love watching the way people show their love and care. Home is the best place you are privileged to see both. I'm enjoying every single moment of it. Sometimes you just don't need to demand, fuss or try at all. You are sent the best people to be with. They stick with you no matter what. I have my dad, my family and the people I have met in the past two years. They are gems! And yes I will always specifically mention my dad because he deserves every single  praise and he will always be the man who  only gave the best to me. 

I was happy like really happy, so happy that I could even cry. It's amazing to be feeling all this. On top of all, it's amazing to just be me. I even skipped cardio and held the dumbbells dancing in the room yesterday  which probably torched more calories  or at least I assume so. 

Gratitude is of dire importance! A day like this absolutely earns itself a post. It's not like a bad day doesn't deserve one. From my perspective, I strongly believe things that I put up on the net should be motivational and positive. I had come a long way to realise how important it is to only see things that makes me happy. Hence I want to grant my readers or random strangers who stop by the same privilege through my blog which is, to read good thoughts. None of you random people knows me but if my words could shine your day with positivity and hope, the blessing will somehow come back to me. I always have faith in that.

Another day of happiness shall follow.

Renuka G

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End of Degree

Five and a half years of journey and not dedicating a post to honour it would be a shame. 

They say everything starts with a dream. My life in IPGM though kicked off with lots of tears, disappointments, did severe damage to my self-esteem yet progressed somehow. Life begins at the end of one's comfort zone, couldn't agree more. Despite all that broke me and wound me, I survived. The credit definitely goes to the wonderful souls I met along the way. Some who sat beside me and listened, the rest who touched my life from a far distance. Thank you is not suffice to show how much I appreciate your kindness. 

There were phases so tormenting I came pass. The fact that I am calm enough today to recall them is just the power of time which turned things over. Nothing lasts forever is both a happy and sad phrase. In this case it is most certainly something I am smiling while writing it down. I don't know your story but this is mine. Speaking from my perspective, all that I am now is everything that happened to me. My past made me myself. Even though it was never in my dreams to teach, the five years were a journey of self-discovery of a kind. I have no grand confessions that my interests have changed, I love what I am doing, I can't wait to be working. No. I can't lie to myself. That is what I learnt.

For many years I lived that way. Lying to myself, giving myself excuses, refusing to accept what is right in front of my eyes, denying reality, trying to be someone I am not. But every single mistake gave me a lesson which I fortunately took as a voice from above. Instincts were a good companion I should say.  I didn't change because I wanted to, it was the call of circumstances that somehow made a huge impact on the person I am. It took me half a decade to finally discover my passion and build my dreams. Along the way I also picked up some great truths about people, relationships and the course of life in general. My story so far seem perfect with the flaws and damages because that is what it was meant to be like. And I am happy to  be holding the pen still.

This degree means so little compared to the experiences but it is of course the milestone which will bring me closer to my dreams. Yes I know what I want to do, like finally.

People sometimes have an unrealistic image of what life should be like and jumps into comparing theirs with the person beside them. It doesn't work that way. We all will achieve different things at different stages after different struggles and different experiences. Life begins when you believe that you too are entitled for success and happiness though not at this right moment, at the same level with someone else. Dream, believe in it, work hard and don't stop till you bask the fruits. That is what I learnt. Nothing beats a strong heart and mind. Once you get the perfect balance of both, you are on your way towards something great.

While some of my peers are celebrating, I am still positively outlining my route to success. I can't wait to make my dreams come true. I am happy what I did not enjoy showed me what I should be doing. Who knew, right?

Never underestimate the experiences life put you through, there's a reason behind everything that had happened. I am humbled and I am thankful. Having said that, I would like wish everyone in my life well and good luck in their future undertakings. You all made this possible.

Renuka G

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Beauty I say..

Beauty lies in the eye of the beholder, I could not agree more. Beauty is something very subjective and I will never find the perfect definition for the word but I would let you know my take on it. Some people believe inner beauty compliments the physical looks. Some claim beauty to be solely judged on either one, mostly agreeing that to be physical looks. I think we have passed those times where we measure beauty by the fullness of the lips and sharpness of the nose and how defined the curls and curves are. Physical looks just soothes the eyes, not your ears or your mind.

Not to offend the drop-dead-beautiful-looking girls out there, you girls are perfect in a way. In my reality though, I  feel what one's looks like is a bonus to one's personality. Simply put, inner beauty before the outer. I have been called ugly, fat and more absurd things in my life, I do not care if it is true. My point is, of all the people I have met the wonderful bunch are not beauty queens or girls who could get ten winks only by  swaying their hair.

As much as I want to condemn some men for selecting partner by their looks, I think the choice is personal. If you prefer to live with a high-heeled mannequin, that is your decision. But my heart goes out to man who sees a girl inside-out. To live with a good face and good mind and good heart are three completely different things. If you ask me, a good mind and heart would walk you a lifetime while the skin sags and the hair greys as time eats you up.

I have heard some ridiculous remarks like physical beauty would give one beautiful kids, cannot be changed, get everybody's attention etc etc. Like, give me second! It is a simple comparison to an orange. As much as it looks good to eat a sliced-orange with the skin-on compared to a peeled one, somehow the skin is not going into your system. Once again, it soothes your eyes but somehow at some point it serves no purpose.

Well, point blank I do understand nobody wants to spend their entire lives looking at something so dull and less pretty. Trust me, we all want a little glow. However, inner beauty without a doubt is the priority! Others are bonus. Just like a good book with a well-illustrated cover, the person you are should overpower youself more than your gorgeous hair and hour-glass curves (which is the ultimate stereotype surely), and that is the real deal!

With that said, I would like to give a big hug and wish a rain of glitters for the girls and ladies and women who are balancing the equation right and for the wise men who own them! Kindly accept this sugar-sprinkled doughnut :D

Nothing beats a smile uh though it looks so retard-like?!

Renuka G

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Sunshine and Rainbows

I don't think you need thousand moments to tell you if you are happy and a thousand and one more to tell if you are a sad soul. All we actually need is to count our blessings. Sometimes we expect too much from people but we fail to realize they have their moods and rough days too. We think life is a straight line build with tons of roses and all sweet things but we miss the roughness of the surface underneath.

Count your blessings.

If yesterday meant something, it sure did. Somehow someday it might repeat, who knows? If today was tough, that's alright, tomorrow it will be past already. Be happy ! It is all in the mind. Smiles are prettier than a frown and nothing compares a good laugh at the end of any day of your life.

There is just so much to be thankful for. Never brood around sadness or self-pity too much, it might become a habit. Happy pills are addictive, blessings are wonderful. So remember,you are your choices!

Life is good for me, how about you?

Renuka G

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Hmm

Days just pass by like this. The same old routine. The day starting will all smiles, morphing into frustrations and later tears. So mundane that tomorrow has become very much predictable. I feel so lost while having my hopes crushed further hard each passing moment. It's not like I didn't try, I did. It's not like I gave up, I'm still fighting the battle. The worst part is, I miss being me.I forgo many things in life because I simply wanna stay happy and escape the stress. This is the ultimate wake-up call I assume, life knows your weakest point. It knows where it hurts.

Just like everyone else, I too have a force pulling me down every time I try to get up.

That's life, right?  No one gets it easy.

Renuka G

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I'm so much more

So one more day to go. It's not like I'm happily counting days for my final practicum to kick start but, I'm just excited to improve. For some obvious reasons I should say, I had been too lenient with my performance. It's about time I stop. Only because I don't like some parts of this job, I shouldn't waste my time playing mediocre. Even more important, I shouldn't prioritize 'things' that do not prioritize me.

Maybe I'm too sick right now. I'm too sick of seeing myself giving up at every fall. I'm too tired of making myself believe I had done my best when there's soo much I could have shown. Let's not brood with regrets or shy away because the other person beside you thinks you are not good enough. I genuinely want to make things work. I want a determination that lasts and a passion that could drive each day of the coming 3 months with much meaning.

Anyone can make an extravagant opening, but only a few finish grand. So why be a common man?

Renuka G

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Sinned-Saint

I have heard of people going on a journey of self-discovery and coming back confused still. I'm different though. I know too much. I know too much about my own self that my inner soul dies to shoot me every time I expose that profound knowledge . Anyone on the same boat?  I can recognize my weakness and strengths, my positive side and the little devil within me, also my ego which measures bigger than my head. YES I just admitted that, stop rubbing your eyes.

I wish I hadn't known this much. It's like committing a crime consciously. It's like making a mistake fully realizing it is one. I can't put it any simpler, unless you are a kid!

The one bad thing about the mentioned is, your instincts telling you what's next. I can predict my actions and it gets creepy over the time. It's like a cliche. Every situation is a no-brainer for I know how I will react to it. It can be so accurate that sometimes I wish I could stop the obvious. More often than a not, I ignore it. You feel me?  Perhaps it is my plain belief of self-discovery being, knowing who you are and accepting fully the outcome. So obviously I'm not innocent. 

Knowing and accepting is a far concept from changing and preventing. I have known and accepted the negative and positive sides of myself, like a boss. However, as far as the other two are concerned, I'm helpless. Or maybe I choose not to help myself. Hey, I am no saint, and I don't fancy being one. The world is no place for the purest of hearts and cleanest of minds. If you think it is, perhaps you are delusional or in denial. You need help, so go to mommy! Plus, it's always better to stand in between two extremes. There's no need to be too good or too cruel. Hence, I feel some emotions are better shown and revealed without guilt. Even though I can't control the aftereffect.

You can call me wrong, you can say I'm ugly and speak everything you wish about my opinions but it doesn't matter. It feels ok for me. I don't wish to sugarcoat the reality of life. My words speak the truth I have learnt, which I assume is valid from my perspective. Too good could land you in a 'too bad'-situation. Agree?

Keeping everything aside, let's just admit this one thing, we all claim we know what is right and what is wrong, so how did the world became so polluted of broken hearts and hurtful words? 

Of course I can't blame the cat sleeping on my shoe shelf, isn't it? It's us! Humans! I don't know what had happened to the world, including myself that I feel mistakes are in the recent times done rather consciously than unconsciously. Perhaps our morals are descending with the drastically increasing amount of stress of the ever-busy world. We don't mind hurting because we have been hurt. We are trying so hard to make the unfair life fair and equalize everyone else's equations like it's at all possible. I know I'm failing, hope you will realize it too. But will we ever stop trying? That's a point to ponder!

(God, I wish I hadn't known this much. Shoot me please! )

Renuka G

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Wisdom-ized

Somewhere between the soaring spirit and rusting memories I realize I have grown so much. You might be praying that I have expanded sideways or floating like a balloon with a melting chocolate in my hand, but sorry you are wrong. I have grown as in, I have matured in my ways of thinking and actions. As cheesy as that I might have sounded, it is no tall-tale.

Below is a prayer:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

The courage to change the things I can,

And wisdom to know the difference. (Serenity Prayer)

It's not like I have been sitting here praying each and every single day. In fact, I just found this today. I thought it bore so much truth to the extent where I can't help but sharing. 

These are the only crucial things we have to know isn't it? The ability to accept some things we can't change so we can live the next day with a peaceful-mind. The courage to change those which are within our means, and finally to recognize which is what. Not everything in life are reversible. If we have the rewind and pause buttons we have always desired, perfect won't be superficial anymore. Remember, life is no media player. It is a ground for strong contenders to battle it out. But strong isn't all about flexing muscles and boxing hurdles in it's face, endurance is a synonym to go to in some situations. However, when an opportunity to flip things over arise, be sure to muster the courage giving it a try. Don't be hasty, stop being too persistent, choose wisely what to endure and which one to change.

Too many things happen often leaving us confused about what's the best for us, that's very true. Therefore learn to put emotions behind and think with your head. Emotions are the worst dictator of all.. It will mess with your beliefs and leak your tear glands and make your hair fall as soon as you begin prioritizing it. Do you fancy that? Like seriously? Think about it. 

Bottomline, if you want to be matured my advice is, master the mentioned three, the ability to endure, change and recognize which is what. Try to reason the good behind a bad occurrence, pursue a dream if there's still a chance and last but not least, accept success and failure as the part and parcel of life.

No man lives in a paradise, but nobody said he can't create one.

Renuka G

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Lemons that made lemonade

Choices in life finally, always, comes down to two. Wants and needs. I believe everyone is much excited about wants rather than needs though the truth is usually, wants being the exaggeration or extension of our needs which may or may not be truly fundamental. Don't think there is necessity to further explain the mentioned because who wouldn't like getting things their way right?

For a fairly long time, I have been that person. I was obsessed about my wants. I want this, I wanted that, I wanted everything my way till the moment I was humbled by my own thoughts. Instead of looking at personal pleasures and interests, I begin to look at satisfaction. Satisfaction of fulfilling certain responsibilities that I deem everyone should bow to. Well, I'm not going to disclose that responsibility of mine but I believe everyone has at least one . The difference being, whether we ignore them because we are drowned by our wants or we embrace them because of our needs. I choose the latter.

Let me give a simple example. Water. We need water as that is human necessity. And we want chocolates. First we have to ensure we have enough supply of water, then we can go look for all the chocolates in the world. Just like that. Responsibilities are the musts, while desires are the supplementaries. At least that's how I believe it to be. And that's how it will be if you are not selfish.

Bottom line, life hit me with two choices, and I picked to render to my needs.  It might not end up a perfect journey, but it's the absolute right thing to do.

Renuka G

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Take a breather

There comes a point in our lives that we close one eye to some things around us. We stop caring who's watching, we stop observing who is doing what, we stop thinking of the what ifs and what nots. We just live life. We throw our hands in the air and surrender.

Not because we are weak. Not because we are afraid. For the reason we choose to take a breather and care less than we used to.

Life begins the moment one realizes both his ability and limitations he has upon his being. He knows where to shine and where to shrug. In actuality, very few things needs our utmost attention. We humans however, have this inborn attitude of dipping a little bit everywhere and anywhere which at the end of the day gets us nowhere.

Sometimes, all we have to do is sit back, and breathe. Too many voices are 'talking'! Too much noise all around! But nothing is 'saying' a thing.

Renuka G

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Spreading joy

You can sit where you are and spend a lifetime chasing after things you think will make you cheese, or you may opt  to open your eyes to the beautiful world around you. 

It doesn't matter if it's a lemon or a lemonade that life throws at you, find joy in simplicity. Don’t let negative situations or people become you. There's no excuse to change the good in you. Hold firm to your ground !

People leave a profound impact on us, our thinking and our behaviour, therefore, choose those who want in your circle cautiously. Most importantly, don't give mind to those who don't matter. Take and give more chances to speak good, mean good and do good to the world instead of peeping through someone's skirt and fanning it.

Next, stop worrying about living the best. If you think today wasn't as good as you wished, you will always appreciate the tomorrows . Live more with days rather than living the best everyday, for that's when you know the benign effect of a mistake. Life is about trial and errors, experiment all along. 

One more thing, attitudes are contagious; spread joy and strive to inspire! The world needs a heads up before the negative vibes drown us all.

Renuka G

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Bye Bye 2

Someone wise or not wise I'm not sure, told me I have a career which will give me satisfaction every single day. And I still am searching for the truth behind his statement because I do feel satisfied everyday,but on the number of hours I get to sleep. I sleep in the staff room in the morning between classes, I sleep after school, I sleep at night. Apart from all the hitting the sack agendas, it's more like stress rather than satisfaction. Especially teaching grammar to year 3 kids who thinks grammar is their granma. Like seriously kids?

creative teachers :)

Having expressed all that should be, I think I'm glad tomorrow is the last day at the school I'm currently doing my 2nd practicals at. Phew! What a journey it was. Too much planning, too much stress, too much food, too many jamuans. God I'm a doraemon now! Yup, even a while ago I was gobbling a bowl of maggie while reading shape.com. What kind of irony is that right? I so need to get back on the track.

Today me and 3 other friends completed the Self Access Learning Corner at school. Finally! We are VERY happy with the results. Hope the kids and the school will benefit from the space prepared. That's the closing ceremony for workload I guess. Tomorrow I'm just gonna do a little pot luck with the kids and call it a day.

You know it's my hand work when there's too many colours :p

Can't wait to go back to hostel as a student. And go home soon. It has been a long time since I last went home. So that's pretty much it. I'm proud of what I've become and I'm looking forward to more challenges .

Good luck to me.

Renuka G

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Cheerrrrrrrr

I have heard many stories and some I have seen taking place right in front of my 4 eyes, considering that I'm wearing a pair of spectacles. However, the stories capable of moving me most profoundly are about people having tons of weight on the shoulder yet sprinkling the rainbow dust to those around them.

Cheerfulness is indeed a value to be learnt and appreciated by everyone. It has the ultimate power to eliminate many negative thoughts and pain within us. It's like a free anti-depressant. People who choose to show happiness and rather spread smile than hurt are the great achievers of all. I have met some along the way , they are indeed a rare breed.

I once read in a book that being cheerful indicates your intelligence of being aware if you live in the state of pleasure, you can have the impact to meet virtually any challenge that comes your way. What makes things hard at the first place is one's attitude of feeding the monstrous emotions like pain, hurt etc. Kill them while they are still little. As mean as it might sound, it makes a lot of sense. Isn't that strong enough? Ok. A LOT of sense. Caps always make a difference *winks* . If you're smart,  start showing happy faces! Good kids.

So it's about time everyone instead of trying so hard to convince your inner soul to be happy, tell your face to do so. Everything else will follow. If it doesn't, keep trying. You have got nothing to lose, a smile is free isn't it? Thank god it is, or I don't know how I would survive all the stupid deals and bets I enjoy making .

Be cheerful, and transmit joy like a  bad virus.  Some nonsense do make sense and are indeed contagious.

Renuka G

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Rain Rain Go Away

A wise man once said, life's tough get a helmet. Even though I have no idea who is he and why he phrased it that way I agreed with him to a certain extent. Today a wise girl is going to say something, so you better be all ears. Life's tough, get an umbrella. Well, I need not further introduce the wise girl for we all know who is she *winks*. Let's just move on.

What is with rain people? What's with the rain? It has been 2 weeks since I was tormented by it. There is no need for me to make a list with nonsensical elaborations on why I dislike the rain because I'm a VERY serious person. Having lied that way, I will only use 3 words to describe the whys. Mosquitoes, flu, waffles.

Mosquitoes. Rain increases the number of thirsty mosquitoes that are picky enough to only find a person named Renuka. I have ordered scientific researches to prove this fact ( Yes it is already a fact before proven),  but results might take more time. So what this mosquitoes do is that, they suck me dry. DRY! And leave me itchy. How mean! Just to avoid unnecessary arguments and physical contact, I avoid going to bed. Plus even if I try, there will be no sleep. Only scratching. And YES I'm too poor to get a repellent, believe it.  Due to this whole mosquito scenario, I am always forced to stay up and play candy crush instead. People call me an addict, some say I have no life, some say I'm just a part of a craze, but nobody knows the sad story behind my candy-crushing agenda. Please wipe your tears, no tears tonight.

Flu. I'm not poor to get an umbrella because I do have one. Yet due to a medical condition I lost my memory on how to use an umbrella, therefore, whenever there is rain and I'm out, it's flood on myself. Sad case. Till now my flu found no cure because the rain found no stop. Life's tough, know how to use an umbrella!

Waffles. I have this weird cravings for waffles when it's raining. And there was one day when I went to satisfy my craving while it was still raining. Guess what happened? Waffles turned from biting texture to scooping smoothness. Amazing uh? NO! It sucked.

How can I not dislike rain?

Well honestly speaking I do like rain. I mean the sound of it, the cold weather in which I could cover my whole self with my blankie, sleep like nobody's business ( only at spots with no mosquitoes), etc etc. But not when I'm tormented like this.

Dear Rain, please take away the mosquitoes and my flu and bring me some fresh peanut waffles :)

Renuka G

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Blurred Whys

I'm going to be super free till next week ends, so more nonsense coming your way. As the preparation for your mind's saneness, read this.

So yeah, today I was, as mentioned, so free, I started to blindly stalk humans on interpals. Well that's entertainment you  know. Like seriously, you have to try that. Reading people's profile is sheer fun-tertainment. Even though mine is one clown-house space, I will still laugh at people's. And what happened during the time-killing event was, I found something. Or more like concluded something. Ok I'm feeling pretty intelligent right now with the use of the word 'concluded', excuse  me a moment for self-admiration...............

So what I concluded was that people around the world especially Europeans, listed numerous asian countries in their profiles as places to visit, but not my beloved nation, Malaysia. SAD case. This is REALLY SAD, because I wrote it in caps. I mean why, why people why? What's wrong with Malaysia? It's a beautiful country  with many fascinating tourist spots. Our islands are mind blowing. Is it that you people are ignorant or chose to ignore?

As a true citizen of Malaysia let me blow my country's trumpet by giving you 10 reasons why Malaysia is a MUST ( notice that caps?) visit nation.

1. Malaysians are very friendly people ( living example here!) . We smile at everyone on the streets. ( Unless it's a Monday and we're in the mood to shoot rather than smile, stay at your own risk) 

2. In Malaysia we have awesome customer service. When you are pissed we calm you down by assuring we will get back to you later, which translates I'm running away, solve your own problem! 

3. Most of our packages to islands come with fresh brochures. Fresh brochures as in, created freshly when the spot was first opened. FRESH artifact now probably, yet still FRESH.

4.  We awe tourists especially Europeans. You think you are humans, through our eyes we see aliens walking on the streets. We admire, stalk every move like a concerned parents. We CARE. 

5.Our roads are never straight. You think that's bad? NO! Roads here will teach you to focus. When you are driving on the highway, don't ever think about letting the wheel go, or keeping your hands still. Grip hard  and keep moving honey! So the good part being, when you return to your own country, you shall be a seasoned driver who could drive through all crookedness in life. ( I know you want to book your tickets already) 

6. We have food everywhere. Literally EVERYwhere. On the road, across the road, in the shop, in front of the house, you name it. But the case of recycling food materials is still going on, therefore, consumption is at your own risk. Believe, trust, that's tomorrow's hope , said a Malaysian .

7. Our journalists wrote so much about travel that the newspaper found it redundant and reduced publishing it already. Yes we lack travel columns, not because we want to write or read about politics or anything. It's merely because we have wrote too much. Please understand alright :)

8. We speak English. YES most Malaysians especially those working at tourist spots, know English. Sometimes we drag a little laaaaaa and meeehhhhhh but we speak no alien-ano . English ok?

9. Our local radio stations have awesome programmes. I assure you entertainment, but do be extra cautious with the volume hike. We are the people of love, so we speak to be 'heard'. Thanks to our RJs for alerting us before we fall asleep. 

10. This is the most important point. You don't want to miss the chance of meeting awesome people, don't you? That's why you have to visit Malaysia. People like the author for example, is rare. VERY rare (caps again!) * blushing*

HAHA it's nonsensical I know. But this post do bear a certain amount of truth, if you read between the lines. Otherwise, Malaysia is a great country. Historical places is Malacca, islands in Terengganu, and food in Penang are the icing on the cake for us. We stand equal to other Asian countries if you could see the very best of my multicultural nation. 

Renuka G 

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